Tag Archive: Victoria’s Secret


Happy Thursday Swimwear and Lingerie buddies.

It’s hot.

Super hot.

Stinking hot and I’m whiney.

I said hot and whiney... NOT hot and grouchy... sheesh, listen people

I said hot and whiney… NOT hot and grouchy… sheesh, listen people

I have a head cold still.

I feel like a ginormous bag of poo.

I feel like a ginormous bag of poo.

I’m as glazed as a donut.

I don't even want a donut.. that's how peeved I am... I couldn't even taste it if one magically jumped in my mouth.

I don’t even want a donut.. that’s how peeved I am… I couldn’t even taste it if one magically jumped in my mouth.

Sigh…

Let’s just go for a picture walk of bra fit issues, okay? We’ll look at the lovely images that Victoria’s Secret has to offer…

See how the bra is riding on the full part of her breast in the left hand picture? Not good.

See how the bra is riding on the full part of her breast in the left hand picture? Not good.

If the underwire is sitting on your breast tissue and not in that handy little crease between your boobs and your ribcage… it’s not well fit.

See how the center gore of the bra is levitating an inch or so away from her chest? Not good.

See how the center gore of the bra is levitating an inch or so away from her chest? Not good.

You may also note that her boobs are spilling out and around the confines of the cup liked squished pudding. Pretty from afar, but far from pretty.

Okay, I'm not really sure if this is a fitting fail or a photoshop fail... I'm gonna go with both. Either way, it's not good.

Okay, I’m not really sure if this is a fitting fail or a photoshop fail… I’m gonna go with both. Either way, it’s not good.

Same issue as above… actually on looking at the images available online, representative of the advertising… it would appear that they think that this is how a bra should fit.

They would be very wrong.

This might be the million dollar bra... but OUCH! Side, front and under spillage, not to mention a serious case of cup pinch... her boobies, I feel really bad for them.

This might be the million dollar bra… but OUCH! Side, front and under spillage, not to mention a serious case of cup pinch… her boobies, I feel really bad for them.

So what have we learned today?

Bra fit can make even a super model type of person look bad. If you want to impress a Victoria’s Secret Fitter or model apparently all you have to do to fit in is wear a bra that is at least 2 sizes too small and pout.

I’d rather rock the confidence of a well fit and supportive bra and be able to remove it without having permanent etchings and pinch marks.

Cheers,

Maggie

If they can't fit their models properly... how are they going to fit you?

If they can't fit their models properly... how are they going to fit you?

Hiya Swimwear and Lingerie buddies!

We’re back to Friday-junior {AKA Thursday} again and today’s fitting tip is coming to you fresh from my highschool yearbook!

Yearbooks= reasons to drink more!

Yearbooks= reasons to drink more!

{I’m hoping that some day, a trip down memory lane won’t be filled with such painful realizations, such as; “Wow, I really wasn’t fat at all… why didn’t I wear more killer bikinis when I had THAT body?” and my all time favourite, “Damn, what I wouldn’t have given for a proper bra fitting to really show off that rack!”}

Don't cry for me... I will fit into that gymsuit again some day... or at least one of my thighs will!

Don't cry for me... I will fit into that gymsuit again some day... or at least one of my thighs will!

And now, back to our original program.

{…in the sweetly twangy tones of Jeff Foxworthy…. cue dueling banjos…}

Double Stuf Oreos

Double Stuf Oreos

If you’ve ever had to run away from a hungry pack of school kids on a field trip because the suspicious small children are following you around, demanding that you share some of the Double Stuf Oreos that you’re clearly smuggling in your shirt, or they’ll tell the museum security that you’re breaking the rules….

{All together now… with feeling!}

…you might need a bra fitting!

Friends don’t let friends venture out with “Quad Boob“!

Tri-Boob is just as bad!

Tri-Boob is just as bad!

Just kidding…but she totally reminds of the lady from Total Recall!

Here’s an example of Quad Boob:

Acckkkk no.. your boobs are trying to eat your face! Watch out!

Acckkkk no.. your boobs are trying to eat your face! Watch out!

Cheers,

Maggie

Quad Boob attacks when bras aren't fit properly! The Horror, the HORROR!

Quad Boob attacks when bras aren't fit properly! The Horror, the HORROR!

Holly Willoughby Models Pretty Polly Bra

Holly Willoughby Models Pretty Polly Bra

Hello Swimwear and Lingerie friends and Happy Fitting Tip Thursday.

So…what did you think of yesterday’s Pretty Polly Bras video? I need to ask because NO ONE BOTHERED TO CHIME IN WITH THEIR OPINION.

{Oops, sorry about the yelling… I haven’t had a lot of sleep lately and I was really hoping to hear from some of you as to what you really thought about the ad. Sheesh… clearly feeling a little bit emotional, gonna go take a little time out, eat some chocolate and refresh my ‘tude}

Alrightey, I’m back. We’ll just put that down to low blood sugar, shall we? Well, thanks to the chocolate it’s spiking now, so let’s ride that puppy!!!! Hmm, may have over done the chocolatey remedy…

You see, the ad leaves me annoyed and faintly offended and I haven’t been able to put my finger on it. I hate not knowing why, so I was rather hoping to hear from some of you both good and bad.

Say there’s an idea! I’ll list some of the pros and cons of the ad and see if that helps me pinpoint the issue.

PRO

1. Lots of really beautiful women, wearing very little except for rather appealing lingerie…nothing bad about that, am I right?

Pretty Polly Bras

Pretty Polly Bras

2. Strange 12 Monkeys kind of vibe going on with the whole mad science theme. I love me some Terry Gilliam so that’s always welcome.

12 Monkeys

12 Monkeys

3. The bras really are rather pretty (though not in a parrot-ish ‘Polly’ or “pollyana” kind of way)

Pretty Polly Yellow Bra

Pretty Polly Yellow Bra

CONS

1. All the OOOOH-ing. I find it really irritating. I love wearing lingerie and a properly fit bra is truly a little slice of heaven, but I’m not acting like Barbarella trapped in Durand-Durand’s “Excessive Machine” (AKA the Orgasmatron).

Barbarella

Barbarella

2. The Buffoonery of all the men (and there are only male scientists….grrr) in the ad. Not to mention, they all seem to be shot in a somewhat voyeuristic and slightly creepy manner.

Pretty Polly Scientist

Pretty Polly Scientist

3. The Fact that the women are given lines such as “Oooh”, “don’t squeeze them…lift them”, “It isn’t a sexual thing, it’s a natural thing”, “I’m a sex Goddess”, “There begins to be a warm feeling”, “The whole area begins to feel tingley and “Is this made of microfiber?” that seem to exude dumb, over-sexed, innuendo dropping dolt. Then a fella tells us “You’re a woman. Be One”. WOW, well thank you sir, sheesh, I clearly wasn’t a woman before, but now that I am all tingley, warm and sexed up, I can definitely BE a woman now! {sarcasm alert}

Pretty Polly Don't Squeeze

Pretty Polly Don't Squeeze

Right…so they seem fairly even, except that the I feel more strongly about the cons than I do about the Pros. I ‘get’ that they are marketing a feeling. The ideal of a highly sexual-ized, extremely fit, fashionable and beautiful woman. That the gags and double-entendre are eye-catching and memorable, but are they marketing to women or to people who enjoy looking at women?

I’m only asking because I didn’t wake up this morning thinking, “Gee, I wish my bra could help dumb down my thought processes thereby making me more appealing”. Now, this could just be all the English and Women’s Studies classes I was silly enough to take but I have to wear a bra. Without it, I would be kicking these puppies around with my knees. I need a bra that will be comfortable and relieve some of the back and shoulder pain that sometimes comes along with being large busted.

Pretty Polly Wind Tunnel Test

Pretty Polly Wind Tunnel Test

I don’t need to know that it was jokingly tested in a wind tunnel. I don’t need to watch women squishing their cleavage for cheap laughs or seeing the scientific community mocked. I need to know that the brand has paid attention to the newest findings on form, function and materials and on proper posture needs and ill-health, side-effects that can come from improperly fit and constructed bras

Pretty Polly Bra

Pretty Polly Bra

I need to know that it doesn’t just cater to fashionable trends. That the company listens to its customers and is actively marketing to the people that will be buying their products, not the 13 year old boys who will be ogling the adverts on tv or Youtube.

Victoria's Secret

Victoria's Secret

[Shakes fist at La Senza and Victoria’s Secret}

I guess, I’m just tired of brands that are supposed to create a product for women, being so openly condescending to their bread and butter and all of us just laughing and giggling and shrugging our shoulders.

Then again, maybe I just need to get a decent night’s sleep and stop bitching. It is a fairly amusing commercial and they certainly pack a whole lot of stereotypes into that minute and a half. It was produced quite awhile ago and it’s still a fairly trendy choice, so who am I argue?

I dunno. What do you think of it all? No really… am I just being overly sensitive and stupid? Tell me, I would love to hear your thoughts.

Cheers,

Maggie