Berni Dexter in Lucy B'a Cherries Jubilee Girdle Set

Berni Dexter in Lucy B'a Cherries Jubilee Girdle Set

Hello my darling Swimwear and Lingerie buddies.

Happy Totally Retro Tuesday to each and every one of you! Are we all observing this wonderful day by wearing our oldest piece of lingerie? Don’t worry, it’s okay to fudge the rules and just wear your most “retro” styled lingerie.

Berni Dexter in Lucy B's Paperdoll Cami Set

Berni Dexter in Lucy B's Paperdoll Cami Set

Myself, I’m kicking it old school style and wearing my favourite retro high waisted undies. I always get a kick out of these and the way they frame up my waist so nicely! They kind of look like this, but not really…

Okay, this is a swimsuit by For Luna, but you get the idea.

Okay, this is a swimsuit by For Luna, but you get the idea.

I know, I know, I really need to get my act together, but these were bought a long, long time ago at a craft fair and didn’t come with a tag, so there’s no way to identify them. Which is a crying shame, because they’re really awesome.

But let’s get a move on with our super awesome vintage lingerie ad for today!

I’m not even going to say anything ahead of the viewing. Just take a look… let it wash over you and see where your mind goes…

Okay, this is obviously the first pop culture reference I got:

Kayser Soze!!!!!!

You know, ’cause the Nylon company is Kayser Bondor… Kayser…Kayser… yah. {moving along}

Anyhoo, we have the lovely lady wearing such a fancy head wrap and all done up to the nines.

{quick aside… did ya ever wonder where the heck that phrase came from? Me too, and there are a whole lot of potential answers and no real consensus. Nevertheless, if you’re a total word nerd like me, you can look here and over here too. Only very remotely related to lingerie, but still kinda related… my tangents aren’t quite so bizarre after all!}

And who wouldn't want a closer look at such lovely silky stockings... Do people really do that? I mean, I obviously have a professional interest in nylons and stuff, but I don't kneel down and inspect them while my buddy is wearing them.... just saying. Oh and FYI, TOTES kidding here, she is obviously one of the earliest adopters of eco-friendly clothing and is drawing the stockings seam line rather than increase their carbon foot print!

And who wouldn't want a closer look at such lovely silky stockings... Do people really do that? I mean, I obviously have a professional interest in nylons and stuff, but I don't kneel down and inspect them while my buddy is wearing them.... just saying. Oh and fyi, TOTES kidding here, she is obviously one of the earliest adopters of eco-friendly clothing and is drawing the stockings seam line rather than increase their carbon foot print!

Okay, got it out of my system. Now let’s get to the fun stuff. So, our lovely lingerie lady, is swanning around in her Kayser Bondor housecoat and making sure to hold the lower half of her garment wide open to fully reveal her “Exquisite stockings in pure silk and nylon.”

And really, who doesn’t waltz about showing off our nether-belows when every other square inch of flesh is completely covered up? This is kinda weird isn’t it? But I am digging the twilight to highlight thing the background is doing.

Her expression is perfectly frosty and aloof, making the viewer feel that shameful voyeuristic sensation that really sells the frilly stuff and makes us all want to seem that powerful when we’re not fully dressed.

I think my favourite part is the fairy dust sprinkling cherubs floating above her snobbishly snotty head!

They're almost as creepy as the Lingerie Fairy! Although, happily, they're showing waaaay less skin!

They're almost as creepy as the Lingerie Fairy! Although, happily, they're showing waaaay less skin!

Do they seem kinda outta place or what?

Seriously? Did the Marketing Exec have to throw them in because Kayser Bondar decided to bring his chippy new trophy wife, who was so young, she was still in her rainbows, unicorns and pink princesses phase, and her big contribution to the meeting was “I think it should have cute little angel babies and lots of pixie dust!” ????

{shudder}

Even this kitty knows that those cupids are totally tacked on and have nothing to do with anything in this ad.

Even this kitty knows that those cupids are totally tacked on and have nothing to do with anything in this ad.

Full disclosure time.

I’m in marketing and I’ve lived this kind of fresh hell before… there’s nothing good that can come of any of it.

I can’t even bring myself to taunt the marketing group that had to put the cherubs in. They’re just so out of left field, she may as well have been holding a corndog, because the CEO’s niece who was job shadowing that day said “Corndogs! They’re just the coolest thing ever!”

…sigh.

Cheers,

Maggie

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